Ali Edwards Archives - Melissa’s Faith Walk

Lamenting While Celebrating

May 7, 2023May 7, 2023
by Melissa

One Little Word

My one little word for 2023 is CELEBRATE, and the assignment in my Ali Edwards Scrapbooking community for April was to photograph moments where your word showed up. I am blessed in so many ways, so I was able to capture many moments and loved ones that are worth celebrating.

Celebrate Through Photos

The next step is to document and reflect on these moments; to tell my story. This has proven to be more of a challenge because I am not sure if I lived through any of these moments without tears. I have cried a lot this month and really did not “celebrate” in any of these captions. There has been a shadow of darkness and heaviness. This has been an internal struggle. I see and know that I have so much to celebrate and to be grateful for. I have faith and trust God. And yet, I am full of sorrow. Sadness. Loss.

I slap on a smile, but my insides are often crushed. My mind and heart are in a constant battle.

I know God is with me and in control, so I don’t want to complain. Philippians 2:14-15 “Do all things without murmuring and disputing that you may become blameless and harmless children of God without fault in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world.”

But I also want to cry out to Him for help. Psalm 55:16-17 “As for me, I will call upon God, and the Lord shall save me. Evening and morning and at noon I will pray and cry aloud, and He shall hear my voice.”

It is hard to distinguish that line. How can I voice these feelings to Him and to others, without it being a complaint?

He Speaks to Me

I have been reading The Call to Joy and Pain by Ajith Fernando. Today the Lord spoke to me through this book, to help me sort out this battle. In chapter four the author says that in order for us to experience joy in the midst of pain, we may first need to lament. “Often before we rejoice amidst pain we need to mourn or lament or express our pain in some such way.” He goes on to say, “The laments are cries of the righteous who despite their faithfulness are going through great hardship.” He points out that a little over a third of the Psalms are classified as laments, as well as the entire book of Lamentations over the destruction of Jerusalem.

These words gave me relief. They gave me peace. I so badly want to suffer well and not complain, yet here I was given permission to hurt. God knows I am hurting. He even expects me to be expressing my hurt.

I want to be honest. I want to be honest with God (He already knows anyway), and I want to be honest with my loved ones and fellow Christians. I don’t know if my pain will help others, but I do know it will be used for purpose. So if anyone can gain something from my vulnerability, I will share.

“We must remember that with personal laments we usually lament to God and to his people. When we do that we open ourselves to God’s comfort which he directly gives to us or which he mediates through his people.”

John 16:20

I will be meditating on John 16:20. ” Most assuredly, I say to you that you will weep and lament, but the world will rejoice; and you will be sorrowful, but your sorrow will be turned into joy.”

My circumstances are hard. I don’t have to pretend they aren’t. I will allow myself to lament, and be careful not to complain. I will allow myself to be comforted by others and I will seek out the comfort from Jesus, my savior. I will give myself the grace that God has already extended to me, and allow these feelings to evolve from sorrow to joy. And I will celebrate. I will celebrate the fact that God is sovereign and He has given me all that I need.

Prayer

Dear Lord, oh mighty God. I come before you humbled and broken. I know you love me and are in control. I know you have a plan for me and my circumstances. I want to put all of my faith in you and trust in your promises. I don’t want to complain or have my words be any indication of doubt. You have blessed me beyond measure and I have so much to be thankful for, and yet my heart is full of sorrow. Despite your presence and being surrounded by so many amazing people, I often feel lonely. I am mourning what once was and overwhelmed with loss. My heart has moments of bitterness. I don’t want to deny my hurt and close the door to your comforts. I am so thankful for the people you have put in my life, that text, call, visit, and pray for me. Lord, soften my heart so I welcome such comforts. Help me to not perceive my feelings as weakness, but to embrace the growing pains. Forgive me for my negativity and help me to celebrate this journey. Be the source of my strength, comfort, and joy. In Jesus Name I pray, Amen.

My personal struggles

What Are We Celebrating Today?

March 25, 2023March 25, 2023
by Melissa

One little Word

Each year I choose one little word to focus on and grow with. This year my word is celebrate. I belong to a workshop with Ali Edwards, and she and her team give monthly prompts to assist in the personal growth through the chosen word. The assignment for March was by Liz Morgan Lamoureux, to imagine a conversation with your word, and turn it into a poem.

Poem With My Word

What Are We Celebrating Today?

By Melissa Pierce

Celebrate approaches me, skipping and singing, holding a cluster of balloons as they soar in the breeze. “How are you today? What are we celebrating?”

“I don’t feel much like celebrating today. The doctor gave me bad news.”

Celebrate barely blinks an eye and replies, “Well then, let’s turn to the Good News!”

The balloons vanish, and before me appears The Good Book. Celebrate flips it open, and the words leap off the page.

Celebrate reads, “ ‘For God so loved the world, that He gave His only Son, and whoever believes in Him, shall have everlasting Life. ‘ Now that is something to celebrate!” (John 3:16)

I smirk and reply. “My heart is burdened with fear, and celebrating just seems impossible.”

Celebrate flips through the pages and reads again, “ ‘Fear not, for I am with you; Be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, Yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.’ So there you have it!” Celebrate announces, “Let’s sing to the Heavens!” (Isaiah 41:10)

“My mind is too busy, contemplating the ‘what ifs’. So I just can not celebrate today.” As a tear rolls down my face.

“Well that is just silly,” chuckles Celebrate, as he turns the pages once again. “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” He flips the pages and says. “Worrying just steals your joy. Listen here,” as he continues to read from the Holy Bible. “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” (Matthew 6-34, Philippians 4:6-7)

Celebrate holds my hand, and I slowly look up. “Let’s pray together.”

“What can I pray for?” I sheepishly ask. “I don’t even know where to begin.”

“That is no problem at all,” Celebrate answers. “Likewise the Sprit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.” (Romans 8:26) “ So you see,” Celebrate explains. “God can hear your heart, so he knows what you need.” The pages move swiftly before stopping, and the reading continues. “Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.” (Mark 11:24)

“That sounds very encouraging,” I say and begin to brighten. But quickly scowl with concern. “I have seen others pray for healing, but they were not healed. How can that be explained?”

Celebrate pauses and looks into my eyes. “It is true that God allows pain and hardships in this broken world. It says so right here,” and the pages again, ruffle in a wind. “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33) The pages turn and Celebrate continues to read. “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, you should as God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do. (James 1:2-8)

I sat silently, contemplating all that Celebrate has said. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” (Proverbs 3:5-6). Together we sit silently and ponder.

“Oh Mighty and powerful Lord, hear my heart,.” I began to pray. Celebrate held my hands and together we bowed our heads.

“Lord, thank you for your son Jesus, as my Lord and living savior. Thank you for the Holy Spirit, as a helper that lives within me. My body, mind, heart and soul are under attack, and I pray for healing and protection that only You can provide. You bore my sins and afflictions on that cross and have the power to make me well. I give it to you and your will. Protect my mind from the darkness, and protect my heart from doubt. I pray, Lord, to suffer well. I trust in you, a God of faithful promises. I pray that when others look to me, they see you with my light. You are sufficient for me. I pray that You be the source of my peace and my joy, and I not rely on my circumstances.”

I paused, as the presence of God took over. My breathing was at ease and my tears dried. “In Jesus name I pray, Amen.”

My eyes open. “Let’s celebrate!” I say. “God is Good always!”

Celebrate grins and light radiates from us both. The Big Book fades, and each holding a cluster of balloons, we skip off into the sunset.

Tag: <span>Ali Edwards</span>